Hate my family & myself ):

I don't know why , to have such a family . Seriously . Quarrel with aunt yesterday very badly . Sigh . Just because she bloody don't wanna lend me 30 bucks . Like so wtf luhs . Hais . Sometimes I do wonder . Am I really from this family ? Or not ? I doubt so too . Cause the way they treat me . Like my dad . Did he do his part as my daddy ? No , ever since he move house cause of some problem , he didn't even come visit me much . Very long then call me once . Talk less than 2 min , he hang the call . No more . Then my aunt , after sec4 , she like don't bothered about me . All she does is ask me work and earn money myself . Sometimes , when I ask from her like 5-10 bucks . All she does is kpkb . That's it . It's been so long since I ask her for money already . Like more than a year + . and yesterday . When I ask her for 30 bucks . She scold and kp . Which makes me so damn pissed off that I almost punch her in the face . But I didn't . So I just bloody punch the wall . Sigh . Am I asking too much from my family ? Or maybe they just hate me ? Seriously if I have money now . I will throw the money back to them on their face sial . Sigh . But doubt I will bear to do it ? ): question been running around my mind . Feeling stress too . Family , friends , job , guys and r/s . Sigh , I wish , I'm stress free ! Don't know what to post . Shall post later on about where I've head to earlier on [: and my hand hurts alot . Tsktsk . Nights everyone !